Does God use you? Do you like how He uses you? Do you wish He would use you in a different way? A way you are more comfortable with... a way that is easier, more in tune with what you believe to be your strengths? God is known for placing us in situations outside our comfort zone and for good reason; He wants to stretch us, grow us, mature us into the persons He created us to be. If we only served where we want to, we would likely become stagnant and unchallenged; truly deep growth does not occur when life is calm but rather during the storms, trials, and tribulations. In James, Chapter 1:2-4, we are told:
2Consider it all joy, my brethren, when you encounter various trials, 3 knowing that the testing of your faith produces endurance. 4 And let endurance have its perfect result, so that you may be perfect and complete, lacking in nothing.
It isn't easy, that joyful consideration in times of trial, but a heart directed toward the will of God is a heart prepared and most importantly, willing to persevere.
Yesterday, a dear friend of mine lost her father in a tragic accident. Her family has already suffered loss of another family member very recently, so their hearts are already tender and vulnerable. Gratefully, they are a family of faith. I praise God for their relationship with Him, especially at this trying time.
Upon hearing the news via another friend, I so wanted to help in some way. I am often uncertain how to proceed in such situations and my timing has more than once been off and awkward; I want to express my sympathy but also know suffocation can occur if too many flock to the hurting individual(s) too early. So, I opted for the conservative/passive course of action: I refrained from immediate contact.
Later in the evening, I discovered plans had been made for two other friends to assist her in a way I'd hoped to be a part of. I regretted then not having made sooner connection. Someone else made a decision for me, which has always rubbed me the wrong way. I was, however, able to spend some time on the phone with my friend, offering her all I could at the moment: My ear for listening and heart to hear. It seemed like so little.
It took until this morning to realize the real source of my discontent: I had wanted to serve my friend in a capacity familiar and comfortable to me, by an act of practical service. That's me - practical. I was disappointed God was using someone else where I wanted to be used. Don't I know by now God knows what - and why - He is doing what He is doing? How quickly we forget He is the Almighty and Sovereign God! So, despite the feeling of defeat at my inability to serve where I had hopes of doing so, I will trust He has placed the right persons in the right places for this task, and I will wait my turn, for I know I am not useless if I am willing. I know another chance will come. I only pray I will see it and be obedient to it when the opportunity arrives.
