Far, Far Away

I'm not sure when it happened.  Or why.  Or how.  I'm only sure that it happened.


There are seasons in relationships when distance grows.  That can be a healthy thing.... it can also be a troubling thing.  This relationship, this time, is a more troubling thing.


I don't sit with my friend.  I don't talk with my friend.  I haven't spent time with my friend in, well, I don't know how long.  Oh, I think about my friend, but rarely go beyond that.  I don't seek my friend's counsel, solace, encouragement, help, or even company.  Why?  Well, you see, I've been busy.  They've been busy.  My children demand my time and attention.  I'm working.  I'm tired.  I'm fed up.   I fall short.  I feel inadequate.  I need "me" time, quiet time.  Just me.  How's that working for you, self?


Not so good.  I feel dry, disconnected... far, far away. 


In my head, I have allowed myself to adopt an "I can do it myself" approach to life.  In my heart, though, I know this causes unnecessary hardship.  So, what holds me back from reconnecting with my friend?


Pride and independence are my stumbling blocks.  Misalignment of priorities.  Wanting to please and appease those calling on me for fulfillment.  


But I know my friend sees beyond my stubbornness, sees beyond my struggles, conflict, distraction and insecurities.  My friend is there, waiting for me to call.  Waiting for me to say I need some advice, need a shoulder, need you.  Whenever you're ready, my friend says, I'm there for you.  Anytime, any place. 


Who is your friend?  Mine is Jesus.  And He is never far, far away.  Call.  He'll answer.