... is out of the bag. I have a new guy in my life and I'm spilling beans about him. Some will love and support. Some will pray for guidance, protection, and wisdom. Some will not approve, but will judge and offer their "tsk, tsk," giving further weight to the hypocrisy nonbelievers see in many Christians - you know, those followers of Christ who Jesus tells that whomever is without sin should throw the first stone (John 8:7)? I've stood among those hypocrites, quietly chastising others for their lack of spiritual steadfastness, lack of obedience, lack of will power. Now, it would appear to the naked eye, I am one of those very individuals who is lacking the steadfastness, obedience, and will power.
It is not as though I deliberately set out to care for someone who does not know the one and only true God. Someone asked me if he's not a believer, on what level were you able to connect, as if it were impossible to even fathom? My internal response: On EVERY other level! This is what makes our one monumental difference so incredibly difficult to come to grips with. Yes, spiritual difference is no light matter, and yet I find myself painfully reluctant to dismiss this man who seeks to understand, validate, respect, and honor not only who I am, but what has made me the individual who stands before him.
Perhaps what adds to my reluctance in any sort of early dismissal is the knowledge of having been married to a "believer," a man who did not willingly or regularly attend church (after all, NASCAR, football, and hours-long naps are healthy alternatives, right?!), who could be as judgmental and intolerant as the best of them, who, by all appearance of lifestyle held ill-regard for how he fed his mind, body, and spirit, who seemed to hold little to no regard, value, or responsible stewardship for the care of material goods, who granted no mercy or forgiveness for his wife's wrongdoing, and repeatedly fell back on a claimed lack of experience when it came to dealing with basic life matters. (So learn something, already!)
And yes, I know as I point the finger, there are three pointing back at me. I am not guilt-free. I guess the point is this: No one is. All have sinned and fall short of the glory of God (Romans 3:23). Do you notice the inclusion (ALL) and do you clearly see the present tense of the above? We "fall short" - 'fall' signifying continually. It doesn't say we fell and no longer do so, but the truth is, it is an ongoing falling short of the mark, which is the meaning of 'sin.'
Ah, but then I am reminded of my counselor counseling me to focus only on what I had responsibility for - me. So, here I am. Sinfully, according to some, keeping company with an unbeliever. I cannot control the thoughts, judgments, and convictions of others. I am not without thought, judgment, or conviction myself. It is my ongoing challenge right now. But as I strive, struggle, and desire to figure it out, I can only hope I will receive the benefit and blessing loving support can provide. My dear Christian friends, don't desert me now.
If someone knows that others are praying for their salvation, are they more or less inclined to embrace the gift? Will they dig their heels in in stubborn and independent resistance or will they be willing to listen... learn... love the love God Almighty has for them?
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